lock in longing
across the sun lit room.
He stands dazed, moving to her side,
an entrancing bright flash of two bare souls.
They speak of their love of old books
and deep woods, passions rise
captured within
their eyes.http://riversruminations.blogspot.com/ >
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17 comments:
Wow! I love it!
I just learned of this form of writing poetry, yesterday. I love your story. Great image!
thank you
This is cool....great for one shot!
:-)
Very nicely done....thank you...bkm
Hey River...
A very touching poem. Is this rictameter similiar to cinquain?
It's like a mirror cinquain....2468642 and the first and last syllables are numerically the same.
Lovely! and the image works so well.
Lady Nyo
River...?
This was Kick Ass!!!!
you know i think our greatest wish is to know and be known...and passions will rise...
I'm not sure if they are similar but I feel they were mentioned together and they look almost alike from your description. I got the idea from this guy Luke on a poetry group on facebook. It sounded like a fun challenge and it was both. Try one! :)
the feeling of new love captured very well... Enjoyed the read very much and found your chosen style quite interesting... might have to try one day! :)
i love the different styles that are continually being shown at OSW...and a great piece with great imagery...not just in the pictures but words too
Thanks for sharing with One Shot
Cheers
Pete
Your poem maintains an experiential awkwardness captured in smooth lines. Great use of form too.
beautiful one shot. loved it!
ah nice...i have seen this before..smiles
i really like the rictameter form - underlines your words perfectly
Sometimes it's difficult to follow form and keep it cohesive. You did it well here.
Nice One Shot, River!
Sweet, romantic, excellent.
Touches the heart of a romantic like me.
By the way, that quote from Chief Seattle has long been one of my absolute favorites.
Beautifully done, River. It does look like a challenge. I love the reference to books and the woods.........and their eyes in both first and last lines. Lovely.
Dear River
A beautiful passionate moment capture from times in words... I enjoyed the accompanying image too.. I relate to the verse very much...
Thanks for sharing..
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com
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