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Minnesota, United States
As I walk along in life, my muses dance with reflection inspiring me to release the thoughts and emotions of my pondering mind through poetry.

Prompt Poetry & Promotion page for The River

*plus the archive of my older poetry

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Their Eyes (Rictameter)

Their eyes
lock in longing
across the sun lit room.
He stands dazed, moving to her side,
an entrancing bright flash of two bare souls.
They speak of their love of old books
and deep woods, passions rise
captured within
their eyes.

Rictameter - the meter pattern (syllables per line) is 2-4-6-8-10-8-6-4-2.. First and last lines are identical.
posted for One Shot Wednesday 21 at One Stop Poetry 



Hope said...

Wow! I love it!

I just learned of this form of writing poetry, yesterday. I love your story. Great image!

thank you

Carrie Burtt said...

This is cool....great for one shot!

signed...bkm said...

Very nicely done....thank you...bkm

Asobime said...

Hey River...

A very touching poem. Is this rictameter similiar to cinquain?

It's like a mirror cinquain....2468642 and the first and last syllables are numerically the same.

Lovely! and the image works so well.

Lady Nyo

G-Man said...


This was Kick Ass!!!!

Brian Miller said...

you know i think our greatest wish is to know and be known...and passions will rise...

River said...

I'm not sure if they are similar but I feel they were mentioned together and they look almost alike from your description. I got the idea from this guy Luke on a poetry group on facebook. It sounded like a fun challenge and it was both. Try one! :)

Helena Malheur said...

the feeling of new love captured very well... Enjoyed the read very much and found your chosen style quite interesting... might have to try one day! :)

One Stop - The Place For Poets, Writers and Artists said...

i love the different styles that are continually being shown at OSW...and a great piece with great imagery...not just in the pictures but words too

Thanks for sharing with One Shot



dustus said...

Your poem maintains an experiential awkwardness captured in smooth lines. Great use of form too.

budh.aaah said...

beautiful one shot. loved it!

Claudia said...

ah nice...i have seen this before..smiles
i really like the rictameter form - underlines your words perfectly

Eric Alder said...

Sometimes it's difficult to follow form and keep it cohesive. You did it well here.

Nice One Shot, River!

Steve said...

Sweet, romantic, excellent.

Timoteo said...

Touches the heart of a romantic like me.
By the way, that quote from Chief Seattle has long been one of my absolute favorites.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Beautifully done, River. It does look like a challenge. I love the reference to books and the woods.........and their eyes in both first and last lines. Lovely.

Shashi said...

Dear River

A beautiful passionate moment capture from times in words... I enjoyed the accompanying image too.. I relate to the verse very much...
Thanks for sharing..

ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay

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